Friday, December 10, 2010

Xmas Festivities

Strangely, I've been invited to not one but two (and a half) Christmas parties this weekend...here are some things I review to get me in the spirit.

(1) A video about Christmas.


(2) A quote I've had for so long that I can no longer identify from whence it came.
Festivity Level 1: Your guests are chatting amiably with each other, admiring your Christmas-tree ornaments, singing carols around the upright piano, sipping at their drinks and nibbling hors d'oeuvres.
Festivity Level 2: Your guests are talking loudly – sometimes to each other, and sometimes to nobody at all, rearranging your Christmas-tree ornaments, singing "I Gotta Be Me" around the upright piano, gulping their drinks and wolfing down hors d'oeuvres.
Festivity Level 3: Your guests are arguing violently with inanimate objects, singing "(I Can't Get No) Satisfaction," gulping down other peoples' drinks, wolfing down Christmas tree ornaments and placing hors d'oeuvres in the upright piano to see what happens when the little hammers strike.
Festivity Level 4: Your guests, hors d'oeuvres smeared all over their naked bodies are performing a ritual dance around the burning Christmas tree. The piano is missing.

You want to keep your party somewhere around Level 3, unless you rent your home and own firearms, in which case you can go to Level 4. The best way to get to Level 3 is egg-nog.

So.

We shall see how the weekend progresses...

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